Sometimes people hurt us, with or without intention. A word, a gesture, an action taken by someone can trigger in us emotions that we feel as being negative for us, we feel as if “they hurt us”. And then we may choose to let it go, forget about it and move on with our lives but at times those actions can hurt us and leave a mark in our hearts. That is when we have the choice to forgive in order to let that emotion go out of our system, out of our energy field. Not forgiving something keeps an open wound in our hearts and makes us feel like someone did something bad to us, like their opinion or action has power over us and ultimately this can be turn into resentment, hate or a serious illness.
Why this happens? Because we are energy, we are in fact a spirit living in a body, not a body carrying a soul. When we cannot forgive someone we in fact keep a negative thought inside our minds which becomes a negative feeling and will create negativity in our energy field. Since the body always follows the energy field, a pain caused by not forgiving will eventually translate into an unwanted physical condition.
If instead we choose to forgive whatever we feel may hurt us, we are doing ourselves a huge favour and these are just a few of the benefits of forgiving:
- Physical health: forgiveness comes from unconditional love; it brings light inside of us, while keeping feelings of resentment will bring in negative energy. If not forgiving for long enough can lead to disease, forgiveness will first take out a burden from our heart, more love comes in, we radiate more love and since our body follows, it will heal itself. In fact our hearts are going to heal our bodies.
- Emotional detach: a wound in our hearts has power over us as long as we allow it, as long as we choose to give it power, be it consciously or unconsciously. When we forgive in fact we release a shadow from our hearts and that will allow more light in. This will translate in changing hurtful emotions with loving ones. You know you forgave something when the memory of that hurt has the same emotional power as the memory of the dress you wore last year.
- Energetic detach: we are what we think and our energy field is created and maintained by our thoughts and emotions. When we have thoughts of resentment, our energy field becomes weaker and will permit more negative energy to come in. When instead we choose to forgive, we send out thoughts and feelings of love and acceptance and this translates in a stronger energy field. We will also find it much easier to smile, to notice the miracles around us and even to attract joyful people because they will feel the energy of love coming out of us. And who doesn’t want to be around the energy of love?
- Live in the present moment: when we have difficulty forgiving, we in fact live in the past. As long as we didn’t forgive, that thought, that memory or that action keeps coming into our minds and hearts. It keeps coming back because it looks to be released and it is our entire choice, our free will to do it or not. Something we cannot forgive will come back to our memory, that feeling of hurt will keep coming back and occupy our hearts and minds and we stay stuck in that past moment keep living it over and over again. We cannot see our present; we cannot see the sun on the sky today just because it rained yesterday. Yes, there may still be drops of water around, but the sun is shining and we can now enjoy its warm touch. We can only live fully in the present moment when we learn to forgive the past and move on.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean agreeing with someone’s unfair or hurtful behaviour, nor does it mean to allow that person to hurt us again. Forgiveness means: I know what you did, I know it was not pleasant for me and I choose not to allow it to have power over me again. I choose to let it go.
Tools to help you forgive:
Meditation brings you in a state where your higher self is better heard and understood and visualisation helps create anything you want. This is a very powerful tool to manifest anything, including forgiveness. You can visualise yourself in the presence of that person and tell them all the things you felt when they hurt you, all the things you disagree with and how you feel about that matter. Then you can see a cord of blue light between your heart and their heart and send them love and acceptance. When people hurt you usually they don’t do it with that intention, in fact they act out of fear of not being heard or accepted or not good enough and when you send them love you help dissipate that fear. You can as well picture yourself holding their hands, looking in their eyes and telling them you understand them, you forgive them and love them. The simple intention to forgive someone will work magic and will start the healing process.
If you feel you cannot communicate to the one who hurt you but have unspoken words in your throat wanting to come out in order to heal, write a letter to that person. Write there all you feel, how they hurt you, how much you hate them for that if the case, anything that goes through your mind and heart. Then burn that letter with the intention that your message goes to that person and your conflict is resolved. Trust me, your heart will feel much lighter once all the paper burned.
This is a hard method to be done, but very effective. It requires first of all taking responsibility for your experiences. In fact everything that happens to us happens for a reason and there is a lesson to be learned from it. When you can accept that you had your own role in the matter, even if only because you may have hurt that person in a past life, when you can see that for whatever reason your soul choose to experience this, you in fact take responsibility for your experience and then it doesn’t have power over you anymore. Next send blessings and thoughts of love to the one you feel that hurt you. You don’t have to agree with their behaviour, just ask they be blessed with light and love. What you think grows, what you feel makes you who you are so when you think blessings and you feel love that is what you become. This may also change that person too, it may make them better people, it may help them heal themselves. Remember: the more you give, the more you receive.
Especially when you find it very difficult to forgive someone, the mind simply cannot accept the idea of detaching itself from the situation and in this case the mind needs a bit of training so the heart can heal. This can be achieved with very good results by using these affirmations that help the mind accept forgiveness. Say each of these three affirmations 20 times at least once a day and notice the thoughts, feelings and visions that come to you during the process. Don’t worries if you don’t get any insights, keep going because your mind takes them in anyway. In this example we will use the name John and the affirmations are: “I forgive John for anything he may have done to me now and at any past time”; “I ask forgiveness to John for anything I may have done to him now and at any past time”; “I forgive myself”. Please remember forgiving the self is as important as forgiving others or asking others for forgiveness. They say the most powerful and yet the hardest words to be told are: “Forgive me”; “Thank you”, “I love you”.
I hope you find your own way to forgive anything and anyone you feel ever hurt you in any way and bring only light and love into your lives. A very simple prayer for forgiveness can be: Thank you, Angels for showing me the way to forgive anyone that may have hurt me and be forgiven by anyone I may have hurt. Please help me find forgiveness for myself so that I live a healthy happy life and love unconditionally. And so it is!
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